Forgiveness cannot be forced. You can’t coerce or guilt people into forgiving.
We all deal with pain differently and take time to process differently.
I don’t advice people, preach or worse, guilt trip people with religious quotes into forgiving those who have wronged them. I used to do that. But not anymore.
Why? Because I hate it when it’s done to me, and truth is, it doesn’t work.
One more thing we need to understand about forgiveness is, choosing to let go of the pain doesn’t mean wanting to go back to the way things were. Some relationships are not meant to be repaired.
Family, friends, lovers, whatever you were before, you don’t have to continue to be. It’s not holding a grudge, it’s just choosing to stay away from toxicity and sometimes protecting your peace.
“If you don’t forgive, God won’t forgive you”.
Bullshit. God is not mad at you. He’s not somewhere holding a grudge because you’re taking time to process your pain and not moving on fast enough.
That being said, forgiveness is good for the soul. Letting go is liberating and healing comes when you let go. But there is no time table for it.
It’s your process. Take as long as you need.