This is not an inspirational post. it’s not meant to be. frankly speaking, i don’t even know what it’s supposed to be.
I haven’t written anything here in a while and i miss that. I miss you reading and in a way, i miss me. i miss the me that writes.
I haven’t been in the right head space for some time and I’ve tried to find a name or description for how I’m feeling and the one word i could come up with, is ‘tired’.
I’m tired of the hustle and bustle of daily living.
I’m tired of answering questions, smiling and laughing and shaking hands and having conversations when i don’t feel like it.
I’m tired of giving myself regular pep talks that everything will be alright
I’m tired of working hard to create a good life for myself
I’m tired of choosing to be happy
I’m tired of being sad too.
I’m tired of being me. whatever that means.
Maybe this is a selfish post and you’re going to tell me that God loves me and i should focus on that, save your energy. I know. but when i think about it, I’m still tired.